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Middle School Mayhem Book 1 - Down with the Dance

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  • Chapter 1

  • Austin Davenport

    Middle school.

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    Profile Picture of Austin Davenport in Middle School Mayhem Book 1 - Down with the Dance
  • I mean, am I right?

  • You might think it's appropriately named because, well, it's smack dab in the middle of high school and elementary school (why isn't it called low school?), but to me it's more like muddle through school.

  • Austin Davenport

    And that’s on good days.

    Profile Picture of Austin Davenport in Middle School Mayhem Book 1 - Down with the Dance
  • On bad days, it’s medieval torture school.

  • Everyone talked it up about how awesome it was with more freedom, new friends, and easy electives like napping and finger painting.

  • Austin Davenport

    But all I got was a Wednesday morning fart in the face (after Taco Tuesday), or in other words, a new principal who hated my guts.

    Profile Picture of Austin Davenport in Middle School Mayhem Book 1 - Down with the Dance
  • Before we get into that, allow me to introduce myself.

  • Austin Davenport here, and this is my story.

  • Austin Davenport

    Buckle up, it’s going to be a bumpy ride.

    Profile Picture of Austin Davenport in Middle School Mayhem Book 1 - Down with the Dance
  • I’m just going to come right out and say it.

  • No suspense.

  • Austin Davenport

    No mystery.

    Profile Picture of Austin Davenport in Middle School Mayhem Book 1 - Down with the Dance
  • There are two villains in this story, Principal Buthaire (he says it’s French, but everyone calls him Butt Hair) and my brother, Derek.

  • They are a match made in heaven, because my brother has the prized family butt chin, which means that everyone, including my parents, likes him more than me.

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  • Austin Davenport

    Seriously, it's like he has a teeny tiny baby's butt on his chin.

    Profile Picture of Austin Davenport in Middle School Mayhem Book 1 - Down with the Dance
  • I don't know why everyone thinks it's so awesome.

  • They've never seen the dark side of the butt chin.